BIG UPDATE on us 9/13/11

13 Sep

Probably one of Graham’s biggest annoyances now is his eyesight.  He not only sees double, but one of the images is tilted.  I drew a picture here for you to get an idea of what he sees normally.  Don’t get too excited…I’m not much for drawing.

With his glasses on, the images come together somewhat, but it’s not perfect by any means.  If any, sometimes the glasses confuse him more because they bring the objects just close enough to make it more annoying to “know” which one is the real or “fake” image.  I had shared that the Lord was doing some things with Graham’s eyes the last time I posted and although his eye appointment did not go as planned, the Lord is still in control and is still working.

The problem with brain injuries that I’m learning (at least with Graham) is that his brain “forgets” or doesn’t remember what’s really going on; for example the issues with his eyes.  One week he’ll come home and tell me that something is changing and he feels his eyes are getting better.  Days will go by without him saying anymore about this, but then it’s like he remembers or it’s hitting him all over again for the first time that his eyes “seem” better.  It’s hard to explain to those not having a loved one go through this, but basically Graham’s brain is still trying to figure out how bad his eyes really are and he continues to get confused about their healing.  It’s hard as his wife because I want to believe him when he thinks he’s getting better, but realistically his eyes have not changed since the spring of this year.

Graham also feels his doctor is holding out on him and purposefully not giving him the correct lenses because he wants to try other methods.  This is just not true.  He’s seeing one of the best brain/eye doctors there is and this doctor has shared that Graham is one of his more “difficult” cases.  It’s not a matter of just getting his lenses or prisms right….it’s much more complicated than that.  All that to say, the doctor did up one side of his prisms temporarily to see if this helps and he’s back on some light therapy.

I must admit that Graham has been frustrating me lately.  Did I just say that out loud?!  I know he’s going to read this as well as so many, but I have to get this out!!  After his eye appointment, which by the way is never a quick trip down the road, but rather several hours of driving there and back and going through the appointment etc, he was just plain having a pity party for himself.  This is definitely part of the “new Graham”.  He claimed that he didn’t know why this had to be so hard, why he was the one stuck with all these problems etc.

Please understand that no one loves Graham more than I do and he definitely is in a boat that none of us want to be in.  At the same time……IT COULD BE SO MUCH WORSE!!!!  I encouraged him by saying that he has to focus on the blessings in his life and remain thankful or it’s going to be miserable for him and us.  First he probably shouldn’t be alive, and if not dead, in a wheelchair or special home unable to recognize or talk to us!  Now that’s hard!  If all he has to deal with is some eye issues, some left side issues and memory issues….I think that’s pretty great!  And yes, I said all this to him as well as some other things he simply needed to hear.


I know, maybe all that is easy for me to say.  I’m not the one living it.  Yet, I AM married to him and live with him and all of this everyday.  It is getting old.  It is hard.  It is sad.  But, all I’ve seen the Lord do in him and us…’s pretty amazing and definitely worth being happy and joyful in.

The Lord has definitely asked much of Graham.  He will probably never have an “easy” road ahead of him again.   Struggling through life will, over time, have to become the norm.  It’s what he’s going to choose to do with this “struggle” that will set him apart from others and allow him to be used mightily by God.  Please pray for Graham in this!  He knows all this, but is having a hard time accepting the Lord’s plan and path for him right now.  Pray that I will be a soothing ointment on his wounds rather than burning salt :0)

Home therapy has started up again with Graham working M, W, & F from 8-9am on his left arm/hand among other things.

Humor of the day:

Graham has never been a great swimmer.  If you’ve ever seen Graham you would know he’s just not built like those swimmer’s you see effortlessly gliding across the water.  He prefers sinking and has to work really hard just to stay afloat.  He’s strong and could always fight his way through the water before, but things are different now.  He gave me quite a scare the other day in the river as he was trying to swim across.  It didn’t help that we were laughing at him while he struggled to swim with only one arm.  Naturally, when this is done, you go in circles.  He quickly got himself into trouble but fortunately, my dad was nearby to rescue him.  He only took on a little bit of water…not too much!  I’m thinking some swimming therapy might be needed soon!!

Some more Humor and a BIG MIRACLE!

I wasn’t sure where to put this and how to say it or even when to say it….but I have to do it sometime so….here goes.

Graham and I are going to be welcoming a new member to our family sometime in April!  And I don’t mean a new puppy or horse.  Although, that would be fun too.  We are a bit shocked, but super excited.  I need you to see the humor here because we just did not think this would happen as quickly as it has.  Obviously, everything with Graham in that department has been ironed out.

It’s crazy to think of this time last year (Graham was still in the hospital) and now, we’re getting the amazing opportunity to be parents all over again.  Isn’t the Lord good!?!?!

Even while I’m hugging the toilet bowl for most of the morning, evening and into the night, I’m praising Jesus for this new life and I’m excited to see what He’s going to do.  Graham is more than ready and capable for this (just in case you were wondering)  He’s been a HUGE help to me around the house and with Wyatt and Keith.

Thanks for praying for us!

4 Responses to “BIG UPDATE on us 9/13/11”

  1. Erikka Jennings September 13, 2011 at 7:07 pm #

    I am praising the lord for the blessings in your lives as well as the miracles. Congratulations on expecting a new baby! God has you all in his arms. God Bless You!

  2. Tami September 14, 2011 at 6:53 am #

    Congratulations to the two of you!!!! God is so good and I know that you both already know that. But having just said that, sometimes things happen in life that you never ever fully recover from. Then you have to learn the new normal. That is what I am struggling with now. The loss of a loved one. Try to keep focusing on the fact that Graham is still here and with you. That is a huge blessing. And the fact that Graham survived and has flourished despite what the doctors were telling you right after the accident means that God does have some big plans for you both. I know that is easier said than done. But what I do is have to remind myself that I will see my loved one again. Doesn’t make it that much easier to still be here, but maybe God has some plans for me as well as I struggle with my new normal. Just keep hanging in there and doing what you are doing. Trying to find ways to glorify your Lord and Savior! Bless you…Tami

  3. Erikka Jennings September 15, 2011 at 7:34 pm #

    Randi and Family,

    I believe that I will be following your posts for as long as you continue to post. Reading those sooths my heart in a manner of thankfulness beyond what most know. I say this with deep sentiment because I have learned through your story and by fervently praying for your family that there is HOPE for head trauma patients. As you were going through the process at the hospital, I can remember crying to my husband that Graham just has to make it. On the hour I was running to the computer to see what update you might transpose on any given day. My heart sunk at some of your posts and for other’s I was praising the Lord. I could relate! Some of the posts I couldn’t. Most of them seemed all too familiar. I did not desire you to be without a husband and to live many years grieving from time to time.

    This morning I woke up after having a dream and realized that in two days it will be eight years since my triplet brother Korey passed on due to a head trauma accident. I then realized just how cold I’ve become to the idea of knowing that he is no longer with us. I have come to terms with the fact that I have held in some pain while also knowing that things get easier as time goes on. I am forever blessed by the story of Graham, you, and your children.

    I am thankful that you have made the decision to post about your progress as a family and both individually. Your posts have helped me in soothing my heart because I am able to see the work of the Lord through your sharing. That is not saying I never saw the work of the Lord with my brothers passing because I became saved through that. However, I will continue to be blessed by all that is given to you through your struggles, opposition, turmoil, and happiness because the Lord is ultimately receiving the glory for those things and therefore, you and your family are growing in wisdom (James 1:5). I praise the Lord for you Randi! After briefly meeting you at WOL, I knew that you were a strong woman! A person who could endure (Phil 4:13) while still moving forward no matter what the circumstances were. You are doing well and praise is to god for this miracle.

    Thank you for your desire and commitment to keep going. God bless you!

  4. Dara September 20, 2011 at 8:31 pm #

    first of all, I laughed out loud when I read your paragraph about the baby… the way you worded that was hilarious. CONGRATS on your newest family member!! that is AMAZING, and I praise God for what this barely-over-a-year has brought for your family! WOW. 🙂

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